Astronaut Diapers

So, I’ve got some bad news. You know, we really have been giving it the old college try in our pursuit to see all of the Oscar nominees for Best Picture. But, like I mentioned before, New Orleans isn’t a market where every nominated film is playing somewhere. We’re actually doing pretty good, considering we lost our Landmark theater and it’s replacement has yet to open. But there is one film that will not be on DVD (or streaming) until after the Oscars, and is not playing anywhere in the area. To be perfectly honest, I’ve already seen the movie. It was playing in Slidell, which is a little haul from New Orleans proper. A couple of weeks ago, I drove there at night in a rain storm in order to see it. I also dragged my exhausted husband, who I thought was being a little whiny, but turned out to be gestating the most heinous stomach flu I’ve seen this millineum. (Sorry again honey). And, as it turns out, I wasn’t terribly impressed. I mean, it’s a cute little movie, and I would have been happy to have it arrive one day from Netflix several months from now. But, let me put in this way: I wouldn’t drive out of my way to see it. And what film am I talking about? Are you at the edge of your seat? It’s…It’s…An Education. See. You’re a little let down aren’t you? That whole build up is meant to approximate the feeling you have when you watch this film, after it receives an Oscar nomination, and you drive in a rainstorm to see it.

Exactly, honey. See, now I feel like a jerk. Carey Mulligan gives a wonderful performance. And there is the supporting role played the incomparable Alfred Molina. And 60s London and Paris is fabulous. And the soundtrack is fantastic! I think Peter Saaaaarsgaaaard was miscast, even though I like him a quite a bit. And Rosamund Pike, who plays a ditzy piece of arm candy, steals every scene she’s in. But yeah, it should all add up, but it doesn’t really. The problem is that there is no transcendent, beautiful thing about it; it’s just a slightly-dated cautionary tale for young women. And Nick Hornby adapted it! It feels like he got bored and just gave up on a third act. Speaking of Nick Hornby, I really miss his “Stuff I’m Reading” column in The Believer magazine from McSweeney’s. He would list the books he bought that month, and then list the ones he actually read (which were rarely the same), and review them. I’ve thought about doing an ode to that in my little blog here. Like, post an ambitious itinerary, but then the next morning post “what I actually did,” which would be something like “played house fetch with dog,” and “watched E True Hollywood Story of Candace Cameron.”

Okay, we got a little sidetracked there. So, if you’re going to go and see An Education after that ringing endorsement, the nearest place to go would be HOUSTON. That’s right. You will have to drive nearly 300 miles. And, if you actually do that, your behavior would have officially crossed over from “determined and committed” to “needs to be committed.” (Especially if you realize you’re running late somewhere around Lake Charles, and decide to wear astronaut diapers). However, if you do happen to find yourself in Houston this week, An Education is playing at the Angelika Film Center. And, if you are looking for other things to do in Houston, here is the most recent NY Times 36 Hours in Houston article. It is from 2005, and I think it’s high time it was updated. Psst. New York Times. Call me.


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One response to “Astronaut Diapers

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